Category Archives: Love

The Spider, The Lion, and The Elephant Fish

. . . . . . It was a blustery day and I found this poem on the beach. . . . . . . . . St. Clair, 2015 Sea froth skips the jetty in this wind, a hopeless … Continue reading

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Final Visit

. . . Hi Folks, A few weeks before Dad died, Larry and I visited him at the Assisted Living facility. He was in the late stages of Alzheimer’s and I was in the habit of jotting down things he … Continue reading

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You Go Away

. . . . . . . . . . . . You go away and the clock ticks louder and slower. You go away and I make deals with myself: No wine tonight. Maybe dessert instead. You go away … Continue reading

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Hers

She came from a northern place— a place with shade, where lakes rest in mountain hollows and moose wade in the shallows under a dragonfly gaze. She didn’t know the desert— where a lake is a turquoise guest drawn by … Continue reading

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Sisterhood

Last night I couldn’t sleep – jet lag, probably, but I kept thinking about Fields of Gold, “A story of two sisters.” Pam Morrison wrote the words, some her own and some from her sister Annie, who was dying of … Continue reading

Posted in Love, Moments, New Zealand, People, Writing | 4 Comments

Beautiful Essays by Cynthia Lim

Cynthia and I were at Berkeley together just yesterday. Now she has written a memoir about her husband’s brain injury. Two of her published essays are available online: Yes or No, A delightful piece about voice that will make your … Continue reading

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Best Left Unsaid

I should have known when the organizer gave us panelists our instructions. “I’ll ask questions, like how should you handle guilt, and each of you will have a chance to respond.”  There I was with my carefully printed remarks on … Continue reading

Posted in Kids, Love, People, Work | 2 Comments

Three Women

Three dark-haired women with my daughter’s eyes. Two gaze out from magazines. One has no face. All three were “performing gender,” a devious phrase —“Performing” – but not for them. Being themselves. Being women. Being targets. Being in the spotlight. … Continue reading

Posted in Love, People, Quirky Stuff | 4 Comments

Sunshine Barusch 10/29/1997 – 6/26/2011

Born into a two-puppy litter in Salt Lake City, Sunshine Barusch left her loving family on a sunny Saturday in June after suffering from the chronic problems of age: arthritis, loss of hearing, partial loss of sight, lack of balance, … Continue reading

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A Wise Woman and Her Loving Husband

Our electrician’s name is Fred. Fred likes to talk. Yesterday, after fixing a broken relay, he settled in for a gab session. He noticed that our cockatoo is plucking herself and wondered whether, like horses, birds chewed on things when … Continue reading

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Afraid of Dying?

Last night at a dinner party a friend asked, “Are you afraid of dying?” We had had plenty of wine, and were settling in to wax morbid and deep. Reflecting on the deaths I’ve experienced, I had to admit that … Continue reading

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More on Iowa

I dreamed of studying at the Writers Workshop for years. The dream seemed to feed on my dissatisfaction. The academic prose I’ve spent so much of my life on seemed dry and lifeless. I’ve longed to be “creative,” even “literary.” … Continue reading

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Going Home

Larry says I came back from Iowa with a twang. Saturday morning, no need to rush, so I’ve made him read my favorite essay, “You have too many prepositions here!” “What’s this ‘oiled up’ Why don’t you just say ‘oiled?’ … Continue reading

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Love as Quest

Ever hunting for first-person narratives about women’s lives, I snatched up a 1998 autobiography by noted literary critic and mystery author, Carolyn Heilbrun, called The Last Gift of Time. The blurb was compelling. Carolyn, it said, had long planned to … Continue reading

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On Saying Good Bye

The night before my son left home I dreamed of weddings and babies. He joked about bringing home a beautiful Israeli daughter-in-law, so maybe that was why. But this dream had a deeper message. Nathaniel is one of the most … Continue reading

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My Demented Weekend

There I was last Friday, driving a rented car that handled like a marshmallow along a 6-lane California freeway. I was bleary eyed from getting up at 5:30, which was way too early for my 7:30 flight, but sheesh I … Continue reading

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Upside Down Immigration Blues

Saturday, July 11, 2009 After you tell a story a few times it loses its luster. Well-intentioned friends indulge you, listening with a polite gaze until you realize you’ve told them before. Then you have to decide whether to pretend … Continue reading

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Auto-ethnography: Life at the Boundary Between Self and Society

Standing before the full-length mirror in my bedroom I am confused. This morning when I posed in my underwear I thought, “Not bad for 53. You go girl!” This evening, it’s “How did you get so stocky so quickly? Cover … Continue reading

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Mizpah

I bought a pin on TradeMe (New Zealand’s version of EBay). No one else bid on it, perhaps because it wasn’t terribly attractive – a bit of silver in the ungainly shape of a horseshoe with a piece of purple … Continue reading

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