Falling Apart Season

A white Iris bloom sits among green shrubbery.

On this late spring day I went to the police station to retrieve my stuff (as the AG put it, "Someone came into your house and took your stuff.") Now that our thief's in prison I figured he doesn't need it. Our detective agreed. It's a strange system, you say your name and case number into a one-way phone then wait on a bench with the other retrievers until a young woman with brown hair who looks way to young for her police uniform comes up from the bowels of the building and calls your name. You sign a form and she gives you your stuff.

In my case, the stuff was some filters for my camera. The woman who came in while I was waiting wanted something else. I couldn't help overhearing, "I'm here to pick up the notebook from my husband's suicide." Then she hung up the one-way phone, sat next to me on the bench and explained it had been six months, thank God he didn't do it at home, she only wishes when he'd told her he was going to call in sick to work she hadn't nagged him "You've only been working there for a week! Why do you have to take time off now, for God's sake?" She didn't know he was going to do it. After, she found some pawn tickets in his room. They were for his coin collection. His will said the coins were to go to his son, so she went to the pawn shop and retrieved them. That was no fun - guns all over to remind her. How old were her kids? "Grown, thank God. It would be awful if I had little ones around the house." The notebook held his suicide note. She already knew what it said. The police told her. But she wanted it anyway. The police officer gave her a clear plastic bag and she walked slowly out the door.

Then a young woman came in to retrieve her wallet and her galaxy. She explained that a galaxy is like an IPad -- she'd show me when it came. She had accused her friend of stealing it, but turns out she lost it on the bus. With her wallet. Those also came in clear plastic bags. She did show me and it did look a lot like an IPad.

When my turn came I grabbed my camera filters, grabbed my camera, grabbed my dog, and headed for the hills. What else to do?

A black Labrador rests from playing with a red frisbee in a mud puddle.
Amanda Barusch

Amanda Barusch has worked as a janitor, exotic dancer, editor, and college professor. She lives in the American West, where she spends as much time as possible on dirt paths. She has an abiding disdain for boundaries and adores ambiguity. Amanda has published eight books of non-fiction, a few poems, and a growing number of short stories. Aging Angry is her first work of creative non-fiction. She uses magical realism to explore deep truths of the human experience in this rapidly changing world.

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We Spend Our Years as a Tale That is Told